Letter to My Future Husband Part Seven: Final Thoughts
Marriage preparation should largely consist of cultivating an expectation of married life that aligns with God's Word.
Part six of this series ended with an encouragement to read the book of Colossians.
When your aim is to grow as a woman of God during your preparation for marriage, you can align your expectation and plan to practice fellowshipping with your husband in accordance to Colossians 3:12-17.
Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive. Above all, put on love — the perfect bond of unity. And let the peace of the Messiah, to which you were also called in one body, control your hearts. Be thankful. Let the message about the Messiah dwell richly among you, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
In a Biblical marriage the principles that govern your marriage shall be:
I will add the note that it is not a good idea to assume that just because you apply these principles to people you meet and interact with now, doesn't make it automatic to apply these principles to your spouse in the future. Why?
Because we live in a world that romanticizes love and reduces the concept of marriage to two people that look perfect and live perfect lives together happily ever after. Therefore many people enter marriage unprepared for the challenges and perseverance required. This is also attributed to the idea that the world system promotes the idea that if things don't work out, you can just get a divorce. That is not God's desire (see Malachi 3:16).
If your marriage preparation includes cultivating a mindset of bearing with your future spouse and forgiving your future spouse, then hurtful actions won't be such a grave stumbling block because you are prepared to exercise tenderhearted mercy and compassion. It won't always be easy and you will have areas to improve, but your expectation will include helping one another grow in becoming more like Christ.
The aim is to have a marriage relationship that is a Biblical fellowship. So your dreams about Mr. Right should include worshiping together, praying together, raising your children in the ways of the LORD together, reading the Word of God together etc. Consider this, if you do not do those things on your own now, how will you suddenly change to start doing them then?
We have to cultivate the habits we desire to live out. We have to pray for and follow Holy Spirit's lead in doing these things on a regular basis.
Marriage is the perfect situation to carry out commands such as:
"And let us be concerned about one another in order to promote love and good works," (Hebrews 10:24)
A husband and wife are companions who share life together. You build routines and carry out your days in light of each other. You plan your finances and make future plans together. The two become one flesh. Thus it is very important that you prepare to be a woman who can love your husband the way Christ commands you to love your neighbor by becoming that woman in your preparation.
In other words do not separate discipleship from marriage preparation if your desire is to have a godly marriage.
For example: Colossians 3:16 is written to disciples of Christ. As a woman of God in preparation for marriage you are a disciple that will one day be a wife who needs to live out the command to teach and admonish one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with your husband.
Being husband and wife also means being Brother and sisters in Christ that spur one another on in the faith.
Lyric of the Week:
"We gon meet in stride then we'll win this race were running"
The race is the marathon that we run as believers to reach the finish line of eternal life. Hebrews 12:1,2 tells us to strip off sin and run the race set before us with endurance, looking to Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.
For two believers (a man and woman) in preparation for marriage, their Christian race has already begun. When they come together it will be a new track team that pushes each other to the finish line.
~A Movement for Biblical Womanhood is Here!